Some of you know that last year I trained for and completed my very first half-marathon. It was one of the most life changing experiences I have ever had. It helped me to realize that all my life I have allowed others to define me and that I didn't really know who I was as a result. All the training and completing the run was about proving something to myself. It was amazing! (See my note More Than A Run for more on that experience.) Well, I decided I was going to participate in the half marathon again this year. Training began a couple weeks ago, and I will complete the run on Mother's Day. I went for a six mile run this morning, and had a bit of an epiphany about my life. You see, when I do something once, I automatically make this assumption that I have conquered it/mastered it and if I do it again, it will be a piece of cake because I know what to expect. Well, I have ran the six mile distance hundreds of times, but today it was a real struggle to complete. And as I was on my run this afternoon, I was beating myself up. I was calling myself a failure. I was doubting my abilities. I almost quit - turned around and walked home. But about half way through the run Natasha Bedingfield's "Unwritten" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TtGY4G7II6s) came on my pandora radio. This song has meant a lot to me and how much I have changed as a person. This song is about freedom and writing your own life story and not allowing others to do that for you. And it pushed me to keep running. And then a few songs later, Pink's "F-ing Perfect": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3G5T9bIdYlE came on (this link it to the edited version!). This song too, just speaks to me and my struggles with loving myself and believing that I am worth it. So I continued to push myself to finish my six miles.
And as I completed my run, I thought about my life and how difficult and impossible it can seem sometimes. Sometimes I want to quit. Sometimes I want to just give up. Sometimes I doubt myself. Do you ever do that??? In spite of all my doubting today, I did it (and faster than I ever have before). I just needed to overcome myself and remember that I AM worth it. I CAN do it. I AM a fighter. I AM strong. I AM good enough. And when I choose to believe that, then I can preserver.
Please know beyond the shadow of a doubt that YOU are amazing! You have strength and abilities that you didn't know you had!!! May you find that song or that quote or that verse that can help remind you of this the way I did today!